Well…the summer is finally over…the kids are back in school…and that means I can FINALLY get some ME time in! Sheesh! Catering to two children for 2 months has been crazy. One would that that a 14 year old and a 10 year old would be able to entertain themselves with playing outside, reading, coloring, watching movies, browsing the internet…ANYTHING…but noooooo. Instead it was 2 months of whining, fighting, attitudes, and craziness!
So…now that I have taken a 2 month hiatus from all things book related…it’s time to get back into the swing of things. Time to find time for reading, reviewing, promoting, and enjoying the book world!
I have learned a very valuable lesson this week. Being a parent is hard. I don’t mean the long sleepless night when they are little, or making it through the temper tantrums and fits of the Terrible Twos. I am not even talking about the sacrifices made so my children could have the opportunities I has a child, or the attitudes I get on a daily basis from my pre-teen and teenager.
No…I am talking about when your child’s heart breaks and yours breaks right along with theirs. I picked up my teenager from school one afternoon and they were sniffling. This sniffling turned into sobbing once the car doors were shut. I did not know what was wrong, but immediately I started crying and I was angry at whoever had hurt them. It was nothing physical, but it was an emotional hurt. And I was helpless. It wasn’t due to a relationship gone sour…or a bad grade on a test. No, it was that a teacher took a position away without any warning or plausible reason. My son was Band President…and he was told after school one day that he was no longer President, no longer Section Leader, and was now just a normal member of the band. He felt that his position was taken away for no reason (the reasons that were given were vague and had no backup). His hard work all year will receive no recognition at the awards ceremony. Instead, so child who did not have the position for more than a week will receive it. I do not blame the replacement, but I blame the band instructor. The reason I received was that he was removed as a lesson of humility and humbleness. That there were 2 instances where my son answered with attitude. I’m sorry…name a teenager that doesn’t have mood swings and talks with attitude from time to time. And a lesson? What 13 year old is going to have the mindset to view what happened as a lesson to be learned and not feel angry and hurt over having something that was so important to them taken away? And the timing…a week before the awards ceremony where he would have received multiple awards, and now will be receiving none. My son feels that all his hard work and dedication was for nothing. What child should feel like that?
So, right now, being a parent is hard! My heart is breaking and I’m trying to keep my angry thoughts to myself. I want my son to keep his head held high and not feel defeated or want to quit. He only has 4 1/2 weeks left of school. So I told him that, while I understand this is difficult, he needs to remain a good student and not feel angry. He can be upset, but he can’t take it out on the band instructor because he has to look at the bigger picture. Next year he will be at a new school, with a new band director, and he can start fresh. He doesn’t have to feel that he is being picked on and singled out like he has felt for the past year. I know this is hard for him, but it’s hard for me because I want to protect him from hurt…and I didn’t.
Remember when you were younger…and going to school and doing homework were the extent of your “responsibilities”? Aaaahh….the good ole days!
Now…I feel like I don’t have time for ANYTHING. I mean, I’m sure the time is there for most of it…but it stresses me out just thinking about it and makes me not want to make time!
First, let’s start off with the kids. There is waking them up (which we know is a process in itself), making them breakfast, making their lunches, making sure they brush their teeth and hair (sometimes another painful process), and making sure they get to school on time. Whew! I’m tired just typing all that out. But…alas…I have time to run through Starbucks and get home a little after 8.
Now comes cleaning the house, doing laundry, updating sales forecasts, packaging and mailing from previous sales, advertising, blogging, taking inventory photos, studying and doing homework for my MBA classes, trying to find time to study for the CBEST that I’m taking in 2 weeks….oh, and remember to eat. Because a lot of the time, that gets forgotten. What time is it now?!? Oh crap…time to go get the kids from school…
So, it’s 2:15 and I’m waiting (like all the other parents parked around the perimeter of the school) for my kid to get out. Once she jumps in the car, it’s time to drive to the middle school to pick up the other kid. Finally, he moseys his way out school and into the car. What’s that? They are whining because they are so hungry and all they really want is a cookie from the local bakery because I forgot to pick up the “good” snacks when I went to the store at some point this week (or was it last week?!?). So…we head there, and some cookies turns into cookies, cupcakes (for home) and flavored lemonades for everyone. Time to head home!
No we are home, and it’s homework time. This battle can sometimes last an hour or more…so be prepared. Then it’s time to clean up and start making dinner because the hubby will be home soon and he will be expecting something to eat. Once dinner is done, served, and cleaned up…time to get the kids ready for bed and relax (ha!). Once the children are showered and tucked away in bed…I can finally go downstairs and maybe read, or watch some TV, or…wait…why is my husband snoring on the couch?!? Doesn’t he realize we don’t get to see each other and just spending time in the same room with him with small conversation is something I look forward to?!? Guess not. Instead, I wake him up so we can head upstairs so he can shower and get ready for bed….so we can start the process all over again in the morning.
So…I’m trying to figure out when I can go the gym, read, relax, maybe go get my nails done, grab coffee with a friend, and just remember that I am a person…not a robot. But…ain’t nobody got time for that!
Anyone else have kids that are on break right now? I hate to call it Spring Break because, when I was kid, Spring Break happened right before Easter. Not weeks before Easter. But, due to the fact that my two little ones have been home all week (and will continue to be home all next week), I have no idea what day it actually is. There is no routine, no structure…just endless days of waking up, tending to their needs, watching them sit around and play video games with their friends while also talking to friends on the phone, ushering them out of the house and forcing them to play outside (their words, not mine), providing meals and snacks throughout the day, and finally collapsing of exhaustion at the end of the day only to wake up and start it all over again.
This week has reminded me how much I love when they are in school. There are a few hours during the day when I can do things like get caught up on bills, return emails, work, and read in peace. I have one more week of this chaos…and then my life will return to its normal state of crazy.
I have been able to read some books this week, albeit not as quickly nor as quietly as I would have liked.
Hands Off by Kayti McGee. This was a quick and funny read.
Hannah’s Story by Terra Kelly. A story of finding yourself after your world is dramatically changed.
More by T.M. Franklin. I will admit, this is not my usual genre. But I won this book in a giveaway on Facebook…and I loved it. I was drawn in immediately by the story and was hooked all the way through. I just need to find time to read the rest of the series!
I am currently reading:
Chandler by Laurelin Paige. This is the 5th book in the Fixed series. I loved Hudson…so I am hoping his little brother can live up to my expectations.
Have a good weekend…I am going to try to find some of the peace I have been missing this past week!
I can recall a few years ago, when my weekends were made for relaxing. That meant being able to sit back and get lost in a story…but that is no longer the case. This weekend, I got NO reading done. I felt like I had no time to actually relax!
Now that my children are a little older…it’s “mom, I need to go here” and “mom, take me there”. It’s band gigs, band practice, bowling, grocery shopping, catching up on work that didn’t get done during the week, cleaning the house, meal prepping for next week, and trying to find some family time in there somewhere!
However, through all the chaos of the weekend, we did find some time to make it to the movies to see Beauty and the Beast. If you haven’t seen it, what are you waiting for? It is AMAZING! Beauty and the Beast was my favorite Disney movie growing up…and this new live-action version did not disappoint. It was full of the amazing songs that I grew up with…and some new ones that are soooo good. We get more back story into Bella’s life, and amazing cast of characters, and a classic love story that still makes me tear up.
Okay…well now that the crazy and chaotic weekend is over, I’m hoping to get some reading in this week. But since my children are on Spring Break, I am sure they will have other plans for my time! Only time will tell…